Foster parents are the backbone of temporary care for children and youth with difficulties at home.
They help serve as a caregiver for a child needing a temporary place to stay before they can go back home or transition into the adoption route.
If you are interested in finding out more about becoming a foster parent, reach out today.
This is an inside view into life as a foster parent with CASDSM. We sat down with foster parent Monique who has been doing this for 30 years, this is her story.
Can you share a bit about yourself and your involvement with CASDSM?
My husband and I have always taken on children with exceptional needs. Our house has become a youth home where we have cared for youths with complex needs. I have 2 biological children of my own, 7 grandchildren, and 2 great-grandchildren. We have been the caregivers for a 23-year-old Autistic youth for the last 16 years. We are also in the middle of adopting a 14-year-old youth with exceptional needs.
Tell me a bit about yourself and your involvement with CASDSM.
There were many reasons we got involved with the CASDSM. Children are my passion and I wanted to make a difference in their life, to show them that the world can actually be a better place.
Foster care and adoption were something I grew up knowing about. I had an aunt who fostered and another one who adopted. We also wanted more children of our own. However, for medical reasons we were unable to do so therefore we decided to foster.
As for any advice that I would give should someone who wants to get involved with CAS in this capacity this is what I would tell them:
- Always make sure to have balance in regard to your biological family and fostering.
- Accept the fact that not everyone in your circle is going to understand your choice to foster.
- If you plan on doing this as a job or an extra income you’re in it for the wrong reasons.
- Make sure you have a lot of training before you begin.
- You need to make sacrifices and put the children’s needs first before your own.
- You need to have a sense of humour, an open mind and be willing to work as a team with the Agency and the biological parents.
- Always treat the bio parents with respect and without judgment.
- Be honest with yourself and the Agency and admit what you can and cannot handle when it comes to children in your care.
Are there any stories you can share that stand out as highlights for you when it comes to this journey? What stands out in your mind in regard to the process with CASDSM?
Children are going through so many emotions during the transition into the foster care system, there were always “little” things that I would do to help ease that. Every time we received a new child in our home, I always purchased a teddy bear for them that I would leave on their bed. When the children were comfortable and depending on their age I would warm up their comforter in the dryer and wrap them with it and sit in a rocking chair and rock with them if they wanted.
The highlight story that stands out for me is to have watched successful family reunification. Also watching the children heal and grow and become productive members in our society. The fact that many of them still keep in touch even today. Knowing that my husband and I actually made a positive impact in someone’s life and allowed them to heal also stands out.
Is there anything that I haven’t asked, that you’d like to share?
In my 30 years of fostering even though we were exposed to some extremely difficult situations in our personal life in regards to fostering, there is not a day that goes by that I regret fostering. One of the most difficult situations unfortunately was dealing with some serious allegations from some of the youths we cared for. However, we always felt that the Agency did everything in its power to support us through our difficult times. I truly hope to see more people who will want to take in this endeavour and make a difference in a child’s life.
What can you share about the process for people looking to get involved?
The Agency has always done everything in its power to support us. Although there is training, it can at times feel like it is not sufficient enough to prepare you for this journey. It is a journey where you’ll experience highs and lows. One thing that I wish was available is more training for future foster parents. Unfortunately, lack of funding and services have played a key role in children not being able to acquire the professional help that they need to move forward.
As Monique has helped us shed light on, the foster parent journey is just that. A journey. There are ups and downs. When you go into it for the right reasons, it is very rewarding, fulfilling, and worth it. Being a foster parent is a much-needed role. When joining the CASDSM as a foster parent you are making an immense difference, you have the potential to change a child’s life.
If you are interested in becoming a foster parent please reach out now.
